Before I met my ex-partner, I was conducting some personal research on dating and online dating sites. (I had a blog about online dating prior to meeting him.) This was nearly three years ago. I had discovered some interesting things; some scary things; and, some things that I just don’t know how to put into words. Three years later and I’m back at it. I was going to pick up where I had left off, but I realized a few things of notable interest that have inspired me to deviate from my initial investigation. Some of these things I will discuss in this blog, over time.
One of the most interesting and eye-opening things I found immediately was that even though it had been three years since I had been on certain online dating sites (and apps), there were a large-ish number of men who were STILL on the site/s—most with the same photos and same profiles. I find this highly suspicious!
So, through various means of exploration, I’ve started to note and analyze the suspicious types or classes of men who use online dating and dating apps. Here’s my working list so far; this includes (but is not limited to) what I call the “serial fisher”, “serial sexter”, “serial creeper”, “serial dater”, and “un-categorized”.
- The “serial fisher”: The “serial fisher”, “sexter”, and “creeper” all fall into a larger, generalized, category that I will, for now, label “the sinister class”. These three all sort of cross the boundaries of each other and have some similar characteristics, habits, and intents. I call the first one the “fisher” because that’s what they do—they fish. They are constantly fishing for women to interact with—on what ever level or for what ever purpose. Unlike creepers, these guys may actually be capable of some fairly “normal” interaction. But, when it comes down to it, they’re just online (for years!) to peruse women’s photos and profiles. As with the sexter and creeper, these guys are not looking for an authentic connection and may be married, in a relationship, merely entertaining themselves (including getting-off on it or getting some kind of devious gratification from it), or just wrong in the head. Studies have reported that between 43% and 48% of “people” use online/app dating for “fun”. I assume that a large percentage of these “fun” seekers fall into the first three of my categories.
- The “serial sexter”: The serial sexter is someone who is online and will interact with you “normally” just enough to suck you into a sex-focused conversation—which eventually leads to full-blown, overt, and (typically) very explicit conversation for the sole purpose of getting-off. These guys are habitual jerker-offers. That’s what they do—they look for women to talk nasty with so they can jerk off (or get some kind of sexual or psycho-sexual gratification). You can usually spot these guys fairly quickly after you start to interact with them.
- The “serial creeper”: Oooohhh…the serial creeper is a bad one. These are the guys who are just creepy-bad-news! You can usually spot them by their profile alone. These are the profiles with either photos of an inanimate object, their crotch, just a weird blurry indiscernible photo, a photo of some stupid quote, etc.. Their profile will either be blank, sparsely filled in, or have obviously fictitious statements and answers. These guys are online for ONE purpose—to CREEP. And, these guys are, most likely, CREEPY offline too. These are the ones who make your skin crawl if you interact with them. I would consider the serial creeper to be somewhat of a predator. They constantly scan and read women’s profiles; surveying their photos and, maybe, sending messages in hopes of receiving a response so they can engage in some sort of antisocial dialog. They may start out with an inappropriate or offensive message right from the get-go; or they may ease their way into it by feigning civility and normalcy at first and then suddenly droping the creepy shit on you by saying or asking something grotesquely sexual. If your instincts tell you something’s not right about them, listen! To be continued…
- The “serial dater”
- Thus far un-categorized